The Knee Bone's Connected To ...
tsb

Such a face! Daddy Bones@ age 12, gracing the book's cover.

 

 How to Keep Your Sanity Intact When a Loved One Needs a Nursing Home  

It’s estimated that more than 50 million people provide care for a chronically ill, disabled or aged family member or friend during any given year.

Studies show that extremely stressed caregivers can age or die prematurely. 

“Bette Davis said ‘old age is no place for sissies,’ but caring for an older loved one isn’t for the feint of heart, either,” says Bones. “I loved my dad and we were very close, but the strain of ‘putting’ him in a nursing home was so overwhelming for all of us that I felt like I was on the edge of a nervous breakdown.”

Becoming aware of some of the don’ts” of long-term care can make daily life easier for nursing home residents and for their family caretakers,” she notes.

Bones offers some key examples from her Nursing Home Checklist:

· Ask clergy, family, and friends - especially those in the health care field - to recommend outstanding nursing homes.

· When touring a nursing home, ask other visitors for frank feedback about the facility. Don’t just inspect the “sample” room, look into residents’ rooms to check for cleanliness.

· Assure your loved one that you will be their ongoing advocate.

· Visit your loved one often and at varying times of the day - and night. This alerts all of the caregivers that you are keeping an eye on your loved one.

· Get to know the staff, especially your loved one’s immediate caregivers.

· Thank the employees for the thankless job that they do.

· Put your loved one’s name on all their belongings, including clothes and personal products. Never leave money or valuables in their room.

· Place a quilt, photos and other small touches to create a “homey” room.

· Put a brief bio and picture of your loved one at the entrance of their room to “introduce” them to staff and visitors.

. Bring old photos when you visit your loved one - it will give you something to look at if conversation lags.

. Bring different edible treats to spice-up the resident's menu.

 

 


 

 

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Monday
Dec212009

Hot Flash? You Talkin' to ME?

DateMonday, December 21, 2009 at 03:24PM

The simple, one-page flyer arrived in the mail addressed to me.

It wasn't sent to "resident" or "occupant," but absolutely, positively directed at me.

I opened up the bright yellow paper and the headline screamed "HOT FLASH STUDY." Then came the details: "A clinical research study is being conducted for an investigational medication for hot flashes." Am I interested? Call such-and-such number at the local prestigious medical center to see if I can become a qualified participant.

Great, wonderful, I am all for progressive research, especially for women's wellness, but I had one basic question: How in the name of Jumping Jellybeans did these folks get my name? What, did they check Macy's receipts for women who have recently bought Liz Clairborne or Jones New York items and figured they were middle-agers ripe for hot flashes? Or did my GYN sell them my info in exchange for a get-away weekend in the tropics? After all, who else would know these details of my life?

So I called the phone number listed on the flyer and politely asked the person who answered how they happened upon my hot flashes. She explained that they use a mailing service that sends out a mass mailing and no, they didn't get my name from anyone in particular. Really, I asked? You mean an 18-year-old guy on my block may have received the very same mailing? Oh, yes, indeed, she cooed. OK, thanks, I said, although I couldn't help but think that the blanketed-communication method she swore to seemed enormously inefficient and unbelievable.

All I know is that no one wants to open up their mail and feel as if a clinical researcher is observing them from afar, watching for impending signs of mid-life hormonal turbulence. What's next: People on the lookout for my carpal tunnel syndrome? My Vitamin D deficiency? Those weird bumps on my...(never you mind)?

I guess that's life in the 21st century - Big Brother, and his Mother, Father and each of his siblings, knowing all.

But don't worry - we have a lot to smile about, including a beautiful snowfall for some of us during a glorious holiday season. Speaking of which, allow me to extend a great big Merry Christmas to all! While we celebrate, let's try to be kind, even when no one is watching and even when it would be easier to be mean or petty. And of course, God Bless us, everyone. See ya in 2010!

AuthorDiane Bones | CommentPost a Comment |

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